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A National Bestseller featured by Good Morning America, The Ezra Klein Show, NPR's Code Switch, The New York Times, Vox, The Guardian and more.

Forbes' "Greatest Self-Help Books of All Time"

About The Book

From psychiatrist and New York Times contributor Pooja Lakshmin, MD, comes a long-overdue reckoning with the contradictions of the wellness industry and a paradigm-shifting program for practicing real self-care that will empower, uplift, and maybe even start a revolution.

Fixing your troubles isn't simple as buying a new day planner or signing up for a meditation class. These faux self-care practices keep us looking outward--comparing ourselves with others or striving for a certain type of perfection.

Real self-care, in contrast, is an internal, self-reflective process that involves making difficult decisions in line with our values, and when we practice it, we shift our relationships, our workplaces, and even our broken systems.

what people are saying about Real Self-Care

  • "This isn’t just another self-help book. Real Self-Care gives us a clear-eyed look at the way social systems drain our energy, and a concrete set of principles to rely on as we declare independence from these systems."

    Martha Beck, New York Times bestselling author of The Way of Integrity

  • "Dr. Lakshmin does a masterful job at exposing the life hacks and shortcut that may seem helpful temporarily...she provides a real path forward with compassion and encouragement."

    Dr. Joy Harden Bradford, Founder of Therapy for Black Girls

  • "Through her lucid, wise, hilariously honest advice, Dr. Lakshmin will transform your thinking about what it means to feel worthy, precious, and powerful. To protect your time, to burn bright, not burn out. I know she'll do that for you because she's done it for me."

    Lauren Smith Brody, Founder of The Fifth Trimester

  • "In Real Self-Care, Dr. Lakshmin explores what it really means to take of ourselves and provides a revolutionary self-care framework that is honest, compassionate, and completely actionable."

    Dr. Becky Kennedy, #1 NYT best-selling author of Good Inside, an CEO & Founder of Good Inside

  • "Real Self-Care is a revelation! Dr. Lakshmin takes us through a journey f unlearning and rediscovery to tackle burnout, make ourselves whole again, and step into our power in a world that is often stacked against us."

    Eve Rodsky, New York Times Best-selling author of Fair Play

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ABOUT Dr. Pooja Lakshmin

Pooja Lakshmin MD is a board-certified psychiatrist, New York Times contributor, clinical assistant professor at George Washington University School of Medicine, and a leading voice at the intersection of mental health and gender. She maintains an active private practice, where she treats patients struggling with burnout, perfectionism, and disillusionment, as well as clinical conditions like depression and anxiety. Having gone down the rabbit hole of extreme wellness herself, Real Self-Care is Lakshmin’s answer to the juice cleanses, the gratitude lists, and the bubble baths — not only to care for ourselves for real but, in turn, to transform our broken culture.

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How to set boundaries

Pooja talks to Mel Robbin’s about her “Aha moment” with boundaries.

You can catch Pooja’s full appearance on the Mel Robbins Show, where she covers time tested psychological techniques for how to know if you are giving too much, and what to do about it, here.

Pooja’s keynote topics

  • Dr. Lakshmin is regularly invited to give her signature keynote based on her best-selling book Real Self-Care (Crystals, Cleanses, and Bubble-Baths Not Included).

    In this session, she covers her Four Principles of Real Self-Care -- Boundaries, Compassion, Values, and Power -- using evidence-based tools, compelling story-telling, and a dose of humor.

  • While we know that empathy for our team members is integral to workplace success and well-being, we are less comfortable with the concept of self-empathy. Bring Dr. Lakshmin in to share what self-empathy is, why it's so important in the workplace, and how to practice it sustainably.

  • Bring Dr. Lakshmin in during a period of grief, transition, or change for a timely session that provides psychological strategies to cope with despair, frustration, or disconnection.